"First of all, you can't put that stuff in your mouth,
you idiot." Frank had a way of telling it like he
saw it. "Man, sometimes I think I hooked up with
a goddamn moron." The thing Frank didn't under-
stand about me -- one of the things, anyway --
was that moron spelled backwards spelled nor-
om. That got me through a lot of lonely nights.
When the cattle cars finally came, me and Frank
wandered around the back for a quick Yoohoo,
but by then everything had gone to hell. "Why,
why, why," Larry (Frank's accountant) said, I
think to himself more than anything. "We always
get stuck doing the stuff that nobody else wants
to do. We always get the short end of the stick.
Screw them." Larry sometimes went off like this
-- blah, blah, blah, whatever. Spoons and forks,
whatever. The point to him was always that there
was no point, except maybe for the point on his
pointy ass. "Jesus," I said, "Give it a rest, pal.
There's only so much Mork Dishwashing Liquid
to go around. No, no, no." (Yeah, like that mat-
tered, was all anyone could think in those days of
clammy Spam and Sprite.) "None of that's
available, not since the wreck. Man, you know
that -- should know that better than anyone's cou-
sin. Does the word plesperous mean anything to
you? Please say no -- Please say no." Real ca-
sual and all. Like nothing mattered anymore.
Then he picks up a bright-green chunk of it and
sniffs it, licks it with his tongue. "First of all, you
can't put that stuff in your mouth, you idiot."
Frank had a way of telling it like he saw it. "Man,
sometimes I think I hooked up with a goddamn
moron." The thing Frank didn't understand about
me -- one of the things, anyway -- was that mo-
ron spelled backwards spelled norom. That got
me through a lot of lonely nights. When the cattle
cars finally came, me and Frank wandered
around the back for a quick Yoohoo, but by then
everything had gone to hell. "Why, why, why,"